Experience on a Psychiatric Ward

January the 14th was a scary time for me, it was my first admission on a Psychiatric Ward. In my previous blog post I mentioned this:

I was terrified, scared and didn’t want to go in.

This was a big thing to me, ever seen ‘Girl Interrupted’? That’s how I imagined the Psych Ward to be like. It was A LOT different.

images (1)

Being forced in all I wanted to do was leave, I wouldn’t talk, I was scared of what was going to happen next. Doors were locked, everything was monitored, basically everything was taken off me, and I didn’t like it. I met this other patient, ”Luna” (changing the name for the safety of her identity) she made me feel welcome, more comfortable, and was someone who I bonded with very well. The other patients also made me feel welcome – I think I made around 7 good friends who I miss dearly.

It was very difficult to come to the senses about what had happened. I was that shocked, stubborn, and pissed off I refused to drink any fluids, eat, or sleep for around 78 hours, before I was told they’ll have to put me on a drip if I continued. So I made small steps, a biscuit, to a sip of drink – after a good sleep (finally!) I did feel a lot better and more able to ‘cope’ through the day.

I saw myself making small progress, I would talk to staff when I was suicidal and wanted to self-harm (although this didn’t stop me, at least I was able to make them aware). I wasn’t allowed in my room some days, cos of how I was feeling which really pissed me off, cos sometimes you just want to be on your own, don’t you?

I had been there a week, and had a bust up with another patient (one which is and will always be a great friend). I was trying constantly through the day to choke myself, and Harriet (again, changing the name) and Luna went and told staff this – obviously it put me in a shit mood, and I ended up wanting to hurt myself more as I was put on basically 15 min obs. The next morning I still hadn’t ‘gotten over it’ as I hadn’t slept. Harriet was flipping out, saying she would ‘put my face through the fucking fence’ and ‘if you’re going to kill yourself at least do it right’ – this point I flipped shouting and screaming until my fav nurse came out. I went straight to my bedroom, with my tassel from my jumper and tried choking myself, doing it properly, and cutting. My fav nurse walked in and knew I had done it, and comforted me, she was like a mum figure.

After this incident they decided to move me to Iris Ward in St Helen’s. I HATED this ward, I would stay in my room all day – I had an assessment later that day, and told lies. I wanted to go home, I didn’t want to stay in that ward – around 6-8 hours later I was allowed home, with support from the Home Treatment Team.

But I learnt that – in a Psych Ward you meet so many lovely people, all with there own problems, but most really kind, gentle, and great for a giggle.

Next blog post will be on ”coping now I’m an outpatient” hopefully won’t take me too long to put it up!


The information provided on the PsyWeb.com is designed to support, not replace, the relationship that exists between a patient/site visitor and his/her health professional. This information is solely for informational and educational purposes. The publication of this information does not constitute the practice of medicine, and this information does not replace the advice of your physician or other health care provider. Neither the owners or employees of PsyWeb.com nor the author(s) of site content take responsibility for any possible consequences from any treatment, procedure, exercise, dietary modification, action or application of medication which results from reading this site. Always speak with your primary health care provider before engaging in any form of self treatment. Please see our Legal Statement for further information.

PsyWeb Poll

Are you currently taking or have you ever been prescribed anti-depressants?
Total votes: 3979